FDA is now Requiring Calorie Counts at Restaurants

And on top of that, other nutritional information has to be made available, in writing, upon request.

How awesome is this?

I know some people will disagree. I saw someone on the Weight Watchers’ board say that it’s only helpful if you understand calories – and I agree with that thought. You do have to have an understanding that most people should eat between 2000-2500 calories a day. And that for most people, eating a 1000 calorie meal at a place is not a smart idea.

That being said, most people don’t go out to eat every meal of the day. It’s usually a treat. Something that’s planned for. Does that mean they should eat 1000 calories in 1 sitting? Probably not. At the same time, seeing that number may change someone’s mind about having that same meal.

Or think about the person who is just starting to get healthier. They might be ordering that salad because “salads are healthy”. But in reality, salads can be just as calorie heavy as that burger. For those of us who are already trying to get healthy and eat better, seeing those calories and having the ability to have access to the rest of the nutritional information, is going to be huge.

I may not chose the “healthy” meal when I go out to eat. The lowest calorie option on the menu. But chances are that’s because I’ve planned for it. But it’s going to make those unplanned dinners out so much easier.

Eat To Live or Live To Eat? That is the question.

I do. I have a real problem with food.

Can you be a food addict?

I realize that is nothing to joke about. And in all honesty, I don’t know that I’m 100% joking.

Food is my weakness. Oh how I love it. I’m not one who can “Eat to Live”. No, I am one who Lives to Eat. That is me. Food is not fuel. Food is a treat. Food is a celebration. Food is a time to get together. It’s an activity.

Food… is a problem. For me at least.

How do you retrain your brain to eat to live? That food is NOT a celebration. It is not a treat. Food is not a time to get together. It is definitely not an activity. Food is fuel.

Food is supposed to help my body do amazing things. Things like walk. Talk. Workout. Food is supposed to keep me healthy. Instead, food, or at least my relationship with it, is doing the opposite of that. Food has me winded when I walk too much or too fast. Food has it so that working out is an awful experience or embarrassment and uncomfortableness. And food is in no way, shape, or form keeping me healthy right now.

And this became very clear when my aunt had her heart attack. I’ve known for years I need to do something about my eating. I’ve tried in the past, and been very successful with it. I’ve known I have a family history of heart problems. I know that my Papa has had several heart attacks and a stroke. I know that his sister just passed away from a possible combination of heart attack and stroke. I know that my Granny has Type II Diabetes, something that can be controlled, and sometimes cured, with diet. And I know that my aunt just had a heart attack with a 100% blockage at a very young age.

I know that I don’t want these things to happen to me. Sadly, these things are starting to happen to me. Back during my physical appointment several months ago my doctor informed me that I have slightly high cholesterol. 27 years old and my cholesterol was 203. My good was low. My bad was high. That’s not how things need to be for me. That means something has to change.

That change came today. I rejoined Weight Watchers, much to the humor of Mr. Chocolate, who politely chuckled when I told him I’m starting a diet again.

Today I stripped down to nothing and stepped on that scale in the privacy of my bathroom. I am not brave enough to go back to a meeting. And after Mr. Chocolate’s little chuckle, which he claims didn’t happen, I really don’t want anyone to know about this. But I’m tell you. All of you.

As of this morning I am my highest ever recorded weight. I surpassed my previous highest every by 3 pounds. I’m embarrassed. I’m discouraged. But I’m also hopefully and determined.

Today’s WI. 245.4 pounds.

My goal for next week is obviously to lose weight. But my overall goal is to have more good days than bad days. More days without secret eating or binge eating. More days where I finish my meal feeling satisfied versus stuffed. My goal is to have more days where I go to bed proud of my food choices instead of hoping Mr. Chocolate didn’t see me eat those last 2 cookies.

I think I can handle that goal.

Holy Toledo Batman!

Ok, so I’m AWFUL when it comes to updating this bad boy.

I think I ignore when I really don’t want to be honest about what’s going on in my life. Because I do want to be honest on this blog. I want it to be my place to turn to when things are crazy, or crazy good.

So since it’s been a while, let’s just lay it all out on the table! Here are my confessions of the past 2 1/2 months.

1) I took diet pills. I did. I know, awful. Why would I do such a thing?? And even worse, I started taking them AFTER I rejoined WW. I had great success with WW while I was taking them. I was down just over 10 pounds. Then I stopped taking them. They made me feel funny after about 5 weeks on them. Fluttery almost. They also made my BP rise. I wasn’t cool with that. So I stopped them. The first week off, I gained some weight. The next week the scale was back down. I realize I CAN do this on my own.

2) I gained back all my weight. Yeah, you heard me. I just told you I took diet pills and lost like 10 pounds. Gained week 1 off of them and then lost week 2 off of them. Yeah, well, then life got crazy. I got emotional. I stopped caring about what to eat, how much to eat, if even if I ate. And then vacation. Oh vacation, it was glorious. I went back to my meeting last night, I held my head up high, I told my leader I knew the damage on the scale, and I accepted it. All of my weight back. Plus .2 pound. It’s weight. It will come back off. This time without the help of diet pills.

3) I broke up with Mr. Chocolate. It sucked. It was awful. It felt like I was ripping out my own heart & stomping on it. I drank too much wine. I ate too much chocolate. And pizza. And pasta. And whatever else I wanted to eat while grieving, because the desire to eat didn’t happen often. I wanted more out of our relationship. Mr. Chocolate, however, wasn’t ready to say he did also. He was happy how we were. He liked our relationship. I couldn’t do it. I was afraid he would never want more with me. After 3 1/2 years he didn’t, what was going to change? I walked away. Crying like a baby.

4) I went on vacation!! Oh, glorious, wonderful, vacation. I drank too much. I ate too much. I explored a different country. I flirted. I danced. I swam with the fishes and flew through the air. Did I mention I ate and drank too much? Yeah, that’ll happen.

5) I got back together with Mr. Chocolate. So apparently 2 weeks apart made him realize he was being a pansy and our relationship needed to move forward. He admitted that the idea does scare him, but the idea of not having me around scares him more. He told me he realized that we did live together, and that he didn’t want it to be “his” home anymore, he wanted it to be “our” home. He wants to settle down with me. Have little blonde haired, blue eyed babies (I hate to break it to him, those are resistive traits. So if I have anything to it they’ll be dark haired. But poor things will be fair skinned as they come!) He told me that I am “the one”. We made up.

6) I recommitted to WW. Again. Yeah, so what? Don’t judge me. I have been going to meetings. I haven’t actually stopped doing WW. (Well, minus the weeks of break-up and vacation.) But yesterday I went back to my meeting. I bought healthy foods. I planned. I cooked. And I’m going to do this. With diet and exercise. Not with diet pills.

Le Sigh

So, yesterday. Let’s just talk about that.

I tucked my tail between my legs. I walked in. I admitted defeat. And I was met with open arms and all the support in the world.

What am I talking about? Well going back to Weight Watcher meetings of course!

I really did feel like a failure when I walked through those doors. Like I was admitting defeat.

Failure-is-not-falling-down-but-refusing-to-get-up

 

But then I realized this. And how true it is. I’m not a failure because I’m doing this again. I’m succeeding because I’m not willing to give up. I will get the weight back off. I will be happy with myself again.

And actually I took a lot out of the meeting last night. I used to hate going to the WW meetings. They were “a waste of time” and “I already know how to do this” type of thing. Last night, it was the same – I do know how to do this. I know how to handle a stressful situation and what works for me – but that being said, what works for me is why I’m going back to WW meetings in the first place. The stress eating, the wine nights with the ladies to decompress after a long day, the “grab & go” food (which is usually pizza). It’s why I had to go back. So really, do I know how to do this?

They also talked about finding an anchor. Something that means something to you to help keep you focused when things get crazy.

Mine is a picture. It was already the screen saver picture on my phone. It makes me smile whenever I look at it. Its a picture of myself and Mr. Chocolate. Back when I was thinner. We’re both smiling, happy. I was happy with the way I looked and felt. That picture. That’s my anchor. That’s where I want to get back to.

I want to be that happy confident woman he met & fell in love with. Not just for him, but even more for myself.

WIT = Restart!

I know its Tuesday, but I really do feel like this is my day of the week to reset.

Monday is done. It’s over. No going back. The hardest day of the week is out of the way. The weekend and all of its crappy food, drinks, and activities as a whole are gone. Tuesday. It’s my day to start over.

And I really needed that restart today.

This morning I weighed in. And it was good news! My scale was down 1 pound this morning. I was so excited to see that. And so proud of myself for being able to lose weight over the Thanksgiving holiday. I know I ate too much. Drank too much. Snacked too much. And exercised way too little. I know for certain, even though I didn’t track it all, that my points were probably very far in the red.

But back to needing that restart today. Obviously, my Weight Watchers week started today. My weekly points reset. It’s a new day and a new week. And thanks to that scale being down and having a new week according to Weight Watchers, I have a renewed desire to do this. To succeed. To continue to lose weight next week.

Some weeks are so hard to basically start over. To continue with this journey. Sometimes it’s just so hard and I don’t want to do it anymore. I want to sit on the sofa and eat Rocky Road ice cream straight out of the carton. I want to eat stuffing with gravy until I feel sick. I want to not go outside in the cold and take a walk. Who am I kidding? That last one is not going to happen.

But even after all that food over the Thanksgiving holiday and weekend, I felt like I had a restart on Monday. I was ready for the week. I went grocery shopping over the weekend and was so ready to start back at tracking and eating right. Yeah, that lasted until about 3pm. Then I ate Snickers; lots of them. And M&Ms; not so many of them. And I had leftovers with Mr. Chocolate’s family. And went home and ate Cheese-Its and orange juice. And I didn’t track any of it. Ugh… don’t judge me, we’ve all done it.

But today, I’ve tracked everything. I’ve stayed within my points. I actually have some leftover, possibly for a couple of pumpkin cookies this evening. I have a plan for the week and I will stick to it. I will do this and be good at it

***

Today’s Plan of Attack:

B: Granola bar, Banana, coffee. -5pts (F/W)
S: Greek yogurt, coffee. -3pts (D/W)
L: Soup, salad. -5pts (V)
S: Hummus, carrots. -2pts (V)
D: Subway sub. -13pts (V/O)
S: Starbucks Grande Skinny Mocha -3pts (D)

I still have 6 points left, so I’ll probably treat myself to 4 pumpkin spice cookies tonight.

Rejoined WW

I just rejoined Weight Watchers for probably the dozenth time. It seems to work for me, and I just need to admit that. I need to stop fighting it and just do it. This works and I know it.

I am!

I am!

That being said, I had to step on the scale in order to join WW. It sucked. It was awful. Totally awful. I am at my second highest recorded adult weight. 229.5 pounds. I’ve done this to myself. I can’t blame anyone else but myself. I’m ashamed of that number.

I don’t know how true that number is. I weighed in after lunch. After birthday cake. And I marked Tuesdays as my official weigh-in day. So tomorrow morning, first thing, should be better. Maybe I’m making excuses for myself, but it’s how I’m making myself feel better about it.

So ashamed of that number. I was 178 when I met Mr. Chocolate. I was wearing size Medium top and 7/8 jeans. This weekend I went out and bought a size Extra-Large top and a size 17/18 jeans. This is not a healthy lifestyle I have going on. Something has to change.

I’ve been letting my healthy eating and exercise slack. A lot. I think I needed to see that number on the scale and have that shopping experience. I will get back down to where I was when I met Mr. Chocolate. I have to. I’m so unhappy in the way I look and feel. Something has to change.

My first goal is to get my 5% mark. Hopefully by Christmas. According to Weight Watchers that is 11.5 pounds, or my weight being at 218 pounds. I can do it. I will do.

I Quit WW

But it’s ok!! I have a plan.

I’m taking the rest of the month of June off. I just can’t stand the idea of tracking anymore. Of worrying about how many points is this. Of stressing about how I really need to focus on my WLJ & get back on track. I’m tired of feeling bad for “wasting my money” on WW.

I just need a couple weeks off.

Not like off-off where I’m going to go buck wild with my eating habits. But I don’t want to stress so much over it.

I also think I’m too used to WW. I know how the plan works. I know the points values for some foods off the top of my head. There isn’t much effort I’m having to put into the thought process for WW. I need a change. Something that is going to make me focus again.

So, starting July 1 I have a plan.

I found a website that told me how many calories to eat daily to lose weight & how when to add in some higher calorie days.

  Maintenance Fat Loss Extreme Fat Loss
Monday 2111 1689 1680
Tuesday 1689 1680 1680
Wednesday 2533 2027 2016
Thursday 2111 1689 1680
Friday 1900 1680 1680
Saturday 2322 1858 1849
Sunday 2111 1689 1680

I plan on following the Fat Loss section, not the extreme fat loss. I’ll probably switch my higher calorie days. I have Wednesday at just around 2000 calories & Saturday at around 1850 calories. It would be better for me to switch those two.

So, my July 1 goals are as follows:

1) Start July 1
2) Don’t step on the scale between July 1 – July 31
3) Follow this calorie plan
4) Keep healthy easy meal ideas on hand at all times
5) Do at least 20 miles of walking in the month (WATP dvds or actual walks)
6) Track with MFP or SparkPeople